5 Lessons The Way We Treat People

1st - Cleaning Lady...

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question

blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2nd - Pickup in the Rain...

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabamahighway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab. She seemed t o be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attachedÂ... It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed awayÂ... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others." Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3rd - Always Remember those who Serve...

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked. "Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies.. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4th - The Obstacle in Our Path...

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5th - Giving When it Counts...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare &serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away". Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

"Work like you don't need the money,
love like you've never been hurt, and
dance like you do when nobody's watching."

Appreciate What You Have !

Sharing a forwarded mail, a very good story, which really touched my heart. It tells you about basic human tendency of show-offs, cribbing for small things in life, not appreciating what we have & no time to thank God for blessings etc.:
One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"
"It was great, Dad."
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah," said the son.
"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.
The son answered:
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."
Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.
Appreciate every single thing you have.
-

The Wisdom in Hot Chocolate

A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired.

During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups — porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite.

He then told them all to help themselves to the hot chocolate. When they each had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said:

"Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress."

"The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink."

"What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup ... but you consciously went for the BEST cups." "And then you began eyeing each other's cups."

"Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups.

They are just tools to hold and contain life." "The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have.

Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate." The happiest people don't need the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

And enjoy your hot chocolate!!

How to Stop Worrying

Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow – it empties today of strength.

Corrie ten Boom
You need to know how to stop worrying if you want to live life to the fullest. Why? Because
worry doesn’t do you any good. It won’t help you live a better life. It won’t make you feel better and more energized. Instead, it will make you less happy and less productive.

But how can we do that? How can we stop worrying? Here are eight ways:

1. Focus on what you can control
Thinking about things you can’t control puts unnecessary burden on your mind. For example, why should you worry about how bad the economy is? There’s nothing you can do about it unless you are a key person in the government. No matter how much you think about it, nothing will change. So instead of worrying about it, focus on things you can control like building your network and increasing your value. Don’t worry about things you can’t do anything about.

2. Use your imagination positively
Worry is a misuse of imagination.
Dan Zadra

Your imagination is a double-edged sword. You can use it to dream big dreams and keep your motivation high, but you can also use it to discourage yourself. People often worry about something because they fill their imagination with all the bad things that might happen. The reality is often not that bad, but it looks worse and worse because they give it too much attention.

3. Expect good things to happen
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin

Not only should you use your imagination positively, but also you should expect good things to happen in your life. Instead of expecting something to fail, expect it to succeed. Instead of expecting people not to like you, expect them to like you. You should be realistic, of course, but always expect to be a winner in life.

4. Accept responsibility
You might make mistakes in the past and worry about the consequences. In this case, the solution is to accept responsibility. Don’t let your worry drag you down. Accept the responsibility and move on. You still have a lot of great things waiting for you.

5. Be grateful
It’s easy to focus on the few things that could go wrong that we forget about the many things that already go right. That’s why having an attitude of gratitude is important. It keeps your perspective in balance. It makes you realize that for one thing that goes wrong there are many more things that go right. Just start with these simple things to be grateful for.

6. Run your own race
Stop comparing yourself with other people. Comparing yourself with others will only drain your mental energy. You have your own race to run. Instead of comparing yourself with others, focus on being the best that you can be.

7. Simplify your life
The simpler your life is, the fewer things you could worry about. So instead of doing a lot of things, focus on the few things that are most fulfilling and give you the most return for your time and effort. Find your life purpose and use the 80/20 rule to choose the few important activities to focus on.

8. Have faith
You should focus on things you can control. But what about things you can’t control? What can we do to eliminate any worry about them? The answer here is faith. You need to believe that everything will go well no matter how bad it might seem. You need to believe that everything will come out better in the end. Having faith eliminates a lot of worries in your life. It gives you peace of mind.


-

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Beers

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the story of the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. _They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar he shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. _They agreed it was_.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. H e asked once more if the jar was full. _The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you. 'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, **_there's always room for a couple of beers with a friend_**.'

Beginning Today

Beginning Today
I will no longer worry about yesterday.
It is in the past and the past will never change.
Only I can change by choosing to do so.

Beginning today
I will no longer worry about tomorrow.
Tomorrow will always be there,
waiting for me to make the most of it.
But I cannot make the most of tomorrow
without first making the most of today.

Beginning today
I will look in the mirror and I will see
a person worthy of my respect and admiration.
This capable person looking back at me is someone
I enjoy spending time with and someone
I would like to get to know better.

Beginning today
I will cherish each moment of my life.
I value this gift bestowed upon me in this world
and I will unselfishly share this gift with others.
I will use this gift to enhance the lives of others.

Beginning today
I will take a moment to step off the beaten path
and to revel in the mysteries I encounter.
I will face challenges with courage and determination.
I will overcome what barriers there may be
which hinder my quest for growth and self-improvement.

Beginning today
I will take life one day at a time, one step at a time.
Discouragement will not be allowed
to taint my positive self-image,
my desire to succeed or my capacity to love.

Beginning today
I walk with renewed faith in human kindness.
Regardless of what has gone before,
I believe there is hope for a brighter and better future.

Beginning today
I will open my mind and my heart.
I will welcome new experiences.
I will meet new people.
I will not expect perfection from myself nor anyone else:
perfection does not exist in an imperfect world.
But I will applaud the attempt to overcome human foibles.

Beginning today
I am responsible for my own happiness and
I will do things that make me happy
admire the beautiful wonders of nature,
listen to my favorite music,
pet a kitten or a puppy,
soak in a bubble bath pleasure can be found
in the most simple of gestures.

Beginning today
I will learn something new;
I will try something different;
I will savor all the various flavors life has to offer.
I will change what I can and the rest I will let go.
I will strive to become the best me I can possibly be.

Beginning today.
And every day.

The Eyes OF Faith

In the middle of the night in a small Midwest farming community, the two-story house of a young family caught fire.

Quickly everyone made their way through the smoke-filled house out into the front yard.

Every one expects a five-year-old boy.
The father looked up to the boy’s room and saw his son crying at the window, rubbing his eyes.

The father knew better than to reenter the house to rescue his son, so he yelled, “Son, jump! I’ll catch you.” Between sobs, the boy responded to the voice he knew so well. “But I can’t see you.”

The father answered with great assurance. “No, Son, you can’t, but I can see you!” The boy jumped and was safe in his father’s arm.

Young child, the little boy had faith in his father even though he could not see his father in the smoke but obeyed his command.
And sure the father caught him as he jumped down and he was safe.

Likewise, obey the word of God even when things don’t seem good. Then God shall bless you abundantly.
-
-

Things that Irritate Us Most !

Telemarketing calls, bad drivers and poor customer service are our most irritating bugbears, 4400 people have confirmed.

Inventions of modern life such as spam email, inconsiderate mobile phone use and speech recognition answering services rated significantly higher on the aggravation scale than longstanding irritants such as barking dogs and having to wait in line.

The results, released today, reveal the majority of Australians think the number of daily hassles and irritating situations we endure has increased in the past five years.

From a list of 32 common daily hassles, respondents were asked to indicate which irritated them.

Inconsiderate behaviour - including dinner-time telemarketing calls, talking to a "robot" and not a "real person", unfriendly or uncaring customer service, driving dangerously to get ahead of traffic, competing for a car space or queue jumping - was a universal annoyance.

People older than 40 experienced more irritation around technology, violence (on TV and on the streets) and bad language than younger respondents.

The Australian Psychological Society, which conducted the nationwide survey, said an individual's response to stress could have an adverse impact on health, leading to high blood pressure, anxiety and relationship troubles. Spokeswoman Amanda Gordon said that while a large majority of respondents didn't retaliate or become physically or verbally aggressive, most people tended to be passive, preferring to talk themselves through the situation, talk to someone else or plan how to avoid the situation again.

She said people needed to learn how to be assertive to deal with situations that really get under their skin. "We know that not responding in an assertive way can [affect] self-esteem and, in some cases, even lead to anxiety or depression."

The best way to deal with an irritating situation was to state the other person's need, state your own, then find a compromise that tried to meet everyone's needs, she said.

"Being assertive is not generally a skill that comes naturally to us and requires effort and training but helps to ensure a 'win-win' outcome."

The top strategies participants used to manage their irritations included

humour (36 %),

taking a few deep breaths and staying calm (32 %),

talking themselves through the issue (28 %),

talking to someone else (27 %),

planning how to avoid getting into the same situation again (23 %)

and exercising (21 %).

The Sun-Herald

Mom's Wisdom

My Mom is in her seventies, and has seen a lot in her lifetime. She faced challenges that we all face one way or the other.

She has seen successes and many happy times throughout her life.

Recently, we were talking and I asked her if she could give me just three pieces of advice to live my life what would they be.

After some thought, she said she would have to think about it. It surprised me that she wanted time to think about it.

She always was free with her advice sometimes even when I didn't want to hear it.

I arrived at her house the next day where she handed me a piece of paper with her three pieces of wisdom written out.

She explained to me that if she was only able to give me three, that these three were the most important.

As I read them, I realized the importance of what she was telling me. She wasn't telling me to save my money, nor was she telling me to work hard.

Her 3 most important things to live a happy life were truly pieces of wisdom.

What were they? Here is the wisdom my Mom shared with me:

1. Make each new day count by helping someone or just making someone smile.

2. Don't dwell on life's troubles, think of the good times.

3. Don't worry about things you can't do anything about.

This was an interesting thing to do.

Perhaps, like me, you have someone in your life that has been there for you, no matter what. My Mom has always been one of my biggest supporters and the wisdom she has given me over the years has helped shaped the person I am today.

Ask that person in your life to give you three pieces of advice to live a good life. You may be pleasantly surprised by the answers you get.

Credited to:

Catherine Pulsifer

Nothing is Impossible in this World

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult. The word ‘impossible ‘itself spells, ‘I’ am possible Napoleon Bonaparte once remarked that the word impossible is found only in the dictionary of fools.

Believe that you are the architect of your destiny. Activate your positive thinking stretch your imagination. Think bigger than you feel comfortable.

Always accepts challenges. In this world, everything is possible on the basis of determination, dedication, hard work, devotion and positive thinking. You want success then you should seek opportunities and accept challenges.

We should not only be energetic but also zealous. You should select one aim and dedicate yourself to that aim. We should work hard with honesty. You should believe in yourselves. You should be self confident and never loose yourself confident.

Never bother about the results, keep on going even if the pace is slow you are bound to face obstacles in the way of success, but with courage and perseverance you can master them.

Your positive attitude and clear frame of mind determine your future. Never leave till tomorrow which you can do today.

Planning is essential if you want success in your life. First of all you should plan course of action. Start your work the day you have decided don’t put it off. Remember the proverb procrastination is the killer of time. Sticks to your plan don’t change your plan along the way. Never give it less than your best. To gather the fruit, to register victory, to score success, you require unwavering faith in yourself.

Faith works like miracles. It looks beyond all boundaries, transcends all limitations, conquers goal. Therefore, have faith take courage and march ahead, onward and upward, till you attain the goal ---from :Saraswati

--P U S H ; Pray Until Something Happen

Ways To Make A Great First Impression In 30 Seconds

The first thirty seconds count. Whether it’s a date or a job interview, our brains make snap judgments about people within seconds of meeting them.

It starts before they even open their mouths. Research shows the first 30 seconds of an interview often determines whether the person gets hired or not.

Most of the time we don’t even realize how quickly we judge people. Our subconscious mind evaluates the person in seconds. Our conscious mind then proceeds to identify clues that validate what we already think.

It’s unfair, but it’s also a fact.

Whether it’s a sales call, a blind date, or a first meeting with future in-laws, if you want things to go well, it pays to be intentional about how you handle the first thirty seconds.

Here are tips to help you close the deal, land the job, get the guy, woo the woman, or win over your future mother-in-law:

Open your body – Before you walk in the door take a minute to take a deep breath, relax your shoulders and straighten your posture. If you walk into the room with open body language you’ll come across as confident and relaxed.

Smile – It sounds obvious, but you’d be amazed at how many people go into a meeting looking like they just smelled something bad. Don’t wait for them to smile at you. Walk in smiling with your mouth and your eyes.

Leave bulky bags outside – Struggling with straps and packages makes you look frazzled and disorganized. If you’re hauling around a thirty-pound Samsonite, discretely drop it by the door before you enter the room. You want the attention on the people, not your stuff.

Make eye contact with everyone – It’s tempting to zero in on the person in charge, but while you’re zooming in, the others feel left out. Upon entering, make direct eye contact with every person in the meeting.

Let them know you’re delighted to be there – A comment like, “ Driving over here, I was thinking about how excited I am about this meeting.” lets them know they’re important to you. You don’t have to suck up, just sincerely share your enthusiasm.

Get them talking within 30 seconds – Don’t start with a monologue. Engage them immediately by asking a question. Nodding with eye contact as they answer helps you establish an immediate connection.

Be prepared, not scripted – Plan some comments in advance, but don’t script things out so much that you sound like a robot. If their company just launched a great ad campaign, plan to mention it. Knowing you have something for later gives you more confidence in the beginning.

Ask an unexpected question – You can ease tension by asking something off- beat like, “They say the world is going to end today, what do you think we should order for lunch? Only do it if you’re comfortable with humor.

Don’t fidget – As tempting as it is to tug at your waistband or tie, don’t. When they’re talking look directly at them, don’t fiddle with your socks.

Be authentic – Planning doesn’t mean being fake. People can spot a phony. The goal of preparation is to give you the confidence that allows the real you to shine through. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is to be yourself.

By: Lisa McLeod (Link)

Spend Time with other Woman

After 21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love.

A little while ago I had started to go out with another woman. It was really my wife's idea. "I know that you love her," she said one day, taking me by surprise.

"But I love YOU," I protested. "I know, but you also love her."

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally.

That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you well?" she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news.

"I thought that it would be pleasant to pass some time with you," I responded. "Just the two of us." She thought about it for a moment then said "I would like that very much."

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date.

She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's.

"I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about our meeting".

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. my mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady.

After we sat down, I had to read the menu to her. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entree, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used t o have to read the menu when you were small," she said. "Then it's time for you to relax and let me return the favor," I responded. During the dinner we had an agreeable conversation, nothing extraordinary - but catching up on recent events of each others lives.

We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you". I agreed.

"How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I answered.

A few days later my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't have a chance to do anything for her.

Some time later I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined.

An attached note said: "I paid this bill in advance. I was almost sure that I couldn't be there but, nevertheless, I paid for two plates - one for you and the other for your wife.

You will never know what that night meant to me. I love you."

At that moment I understood the importance of saying, in time: "I LOVE YOU" and giving our loved ones the time that they deserve.

Nothing in life is more important than God and your family and friends. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot be put off til "some other time".

Someone once said "I've learned that, regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.

I think this is true with your in-laws, grandchildren, sisters, brothers and your friends. Anyone that means something to you-you should spend time with them and let them know how much they mean to you as often as you can.

How to Kill Your Excuses

We all make excuses.

But the successful ones are those who can kill the excuses like the miserable maggots they are.

I’m too tired. I don’t have the time. I don’t feel motivated. I’d rather do nothing. I don’t have the money, equipment, space. I can’t because …

We’ve all made the excuses.

Here’s how to kill them.

See the positive. Excuses are usually made because we don’t feel like doing something — we’re accentuating the negative. Instead, see the fun in something, the joy in it. And maintain a positive attitude, or you’ll never beat the excuses.

Take responsibility. Excuses are ways to get out of owning up to something. If we don’t have the time, money, equipment, etc., then it’s not our fault, right? Wrong. Take responsibility, and own the solution.

Find a solution. Just about every problem has a solution. Don’t have time? Start with just 5-10 minutes. Make the time. Wake earlier. Do it during lunch. Don’t have a gym membership? Workout at home or in the office. Don’t have the energy? Do it when you have higher levels of energy. You’re smart. Figure out the solution.

See your goal. This is your motivation — your reason for doing it. Sure, you could just lay on the couch, but if you think about why you really want to pursue a goal, you’ll be motivated. Visualize that goal and just get started.

Be accountable. Have a workout partner, a project partner, a team, someone to report to. If you have to meet a coach or partner, you’re more likely to do something.

Go ahead and make your excuses. Then do it anyway.

Watch this. Then go and do it.

Click this >> Just Do It !

How to Live a Better Life with Less

Post written by Leo Babauta

I’ve worked for more than 5 years now to simplify my life, and while I’ve discovered the sublime joys of living a simple life, I’ve realized most people don’t get it.

“Why would I want LESS?” they ask themselves. “Less is less fun, harder, monk-like, boring.”

The simple answer: because life can be so much better with less.

That’s hard to believe if you haven’t tried it, but today I am happier than ever. I’m better off financially than ever, now that I’m out of debt and living blissfully debt-free. I am unencumbered by a crapload of stuff, and I have room in my life for what’s truly important: my family, my writing, and my twin loves of reading and running.

The beautiful thing is that you don’t need to earn more money or buy a bigger house or car or have a bigger company in order to have this better life — you need less of all of that. It’s attainable simply by cutting back.

Here’s how to do it — briefly. This will be familiar to long-time readers, but it’s a necessary primer for newer converts.

Do less. Cut back on your workload, on your commitments, on your schedule, on your todo list. Focus on the things that make the highest impact, and drop everything else. You can do this slowly, over time, but do it consciously. The result is you’ll have more room in your life for other things, you’ll be more effective with your time, and you’ll be less stressed out. Read more.

Have less. If you learn that enjoyment of life isn’t having stuff, you’ll be able to let go of it … and declutter. Having a life with a minimal amount of clutter is so enjoyable, so peaceful, it’s hard to describe. It leaves you feeling free, without the stress that comes with an overwhelming amount of stuff, and leaves room in your life for relaxation. Less of a focus on buying stuff means you also have more money, or less debt, or you need to work less in order to live the life you want. Any of those options are good.

Produce less. This is nonsensical to a lot of people — after all, aren’t we all trying to Get Things Done? To Get More Done? Well, that’s the norm, I’ll grant you that — people seem to think that producing grand amounts is great — to write a prodigious amount, to code a prodigious amount, to create a ton of products, to churn out services at an astronomical rate, to have more billable hours than anyone else. Well, that’s fine if you want your life to be all about churning out stuff, but not if you’re concerned about quality, about beauty, about meaning, and about having a life outside of producing. Instead, try producing less — spend more time making better things. Spend more time editing your work down to less, leaving only the most essential parts. Embrace a philosophy that work which is edited down to a minimum is better than volume.

Consume less. This is about how many resources we consume, how much we eat, how much waste we produce from our consumption. Instead of consuming, focus on enjoying what you have, preserving the beauty in what you’ve attained, being content with what’s already around you.

Connect online less. I love connecting with others online. Unfortunately, it consumes our lives if we let it. So if you do a lot of connecting online, through email and web surfing and blog reading and Twittering and Facebooking and what have you … cut back a little. Disconnect from time to time. Read the beta version of my book, Focus.

Connect with others, and your passions, more. Ah, here’s the good part. This is how your life becomes better, not worse, in living a life with less. It’s better because you disconnect from the online world in order to connect with what’s truly important: your loved ones, real people in the real world, and the things you really love doing. You’ve cut things out of your life not just for the sake of cutting, but for the sake of making room for what you’re really passionate about.

Edit, edit. Simplifying isn’t a one-step process of cutting things out. It’s an ongoing process, not only of simplifying but of putting a focus on what’s essential … and then continuing to edit. Think of your life as a work of art, and you as the artist. Come back to it and make it more beautiful by whittling away the unnecessary. Then come back and do it again, and again, until all you’re left with is what’s most beautiful, what’s most essential.

Life can really be better with less, if what’s left is what you love.

3 Ways To Teach Your Children How To Problem-Solve

Children can act out in inappropriate ways when they don't know how to problem-solve. It’s a mechanism by which they have learned to cope and they use it to make someone else solve the problem for them. Here are three of these ways that can give you a firm idea of how simplistic and realistic these tools are in turning things around and quickly.

1. Make direct statements. Be straightforward in telling the child what you want, be firm and clear, then walk away. Don't be worried that you seem powerless here. You have placed the responsibility and accountability for his actions squarely on his shoulders and that is powerful!

2. Disconnect. Stop communication with the child if they're being abusive or disrespectful. Make it a power vacuum, and you'll be amazed how fast things change. This is one that we've started using and I can't believe how good it works. Communication should not resume until the child takes responsibility for their behavior.

3. Make the consequences task-oriented and time-limited. As often as possible use consequences that are directly connected to the problem behavior, e.g. "you cannot use the phone until you finish your homework tonight". Remember your child cannot be punished into acceptable behavior. They should be short term, not a prison term.

In conclusion, don't expect overnight results. Results will come, just not all at once. And then the blame will be replaced with gratitude.

5 Habits to Reload Your Family

Is your family stuck in a rut? Are you bored? Do you find yourself wondering how you got so far off track?

You’re not alone!

All families go through times like these occasionally. I know I would love to be able to push a pause button and just sit, regroup and get back on track.

While that’s not literally an option, life doesn’t come with a pause button, there are ways we can get back in touch with our families. With a bit of effort it is possible to get in sync, connect and move forward in a deliberate and meaningful way as a team.

I have a great family who I love dearly but that’s not to say we get off track from time to time. I want to share with you a few things to get back on the same page.

1. Have deep and meaningful conversations. After being with someone for months or years it’s easy to take them for granted. We assume we know them better than they know themselves. We consider ourselves experts on their likes and dislikes, their needs and wants. And I’m sure you know what they say about assuming. The thing is people change. Their tastes change. Their hopes and dreams evolve. Their outlook on life has likely changed significantly to what it was 15 years ago.

The simple act of sitting and talking about things that matter can do wonders to deepen the understanding we have for one another.

2. Be present. When we’re distracted by cell phones, email, work, presentations, TV etc. it’s difficult to really appreciate what’s going on around you. Think about it – if you’re at work trying to have a conversation with your boss but he/she is constantly checking his/her email, phone messages and waving at everyone that walks past the window, how would you feel? Frustrated? Unimportant? Discounted?

You can only fully experience something and give someone your undivided attention when you don’t have the temptation to be somewhere other than where you are in that moment. Your family is no different.

3. Do something fun. Block out a chunk of time and do something fun with your entire family. Go for a walk, ride your bikes or go skating. Do something none of you have done before like rock-wall climbing, yoga or badminton. Team activities where you have to work together to succeed are great ways to promote trust, increase the sense of belonging and unite you as a team.

4. Plan for the future. Think as long term or short term. Maybe you want to plan your summer holidays or what you will do once you’re done school. Maybe you want to plan a little further out and think about retirement or early retirement if that’s in the cards. Planning together gives a sense of longevity to the relationship and gives you something to work towards together.

5. Invest in your family. Take the time to really put your family first. So many of us simply pay lip service to the phrase “family is my number one priority” yet very few of us actually live it. Investing a bit of time and energy in your family can tighten that core unit, make everyone feel safe and secure and raise happiness to levels you only imagined.

Habits to Make Your Life in Order

Recycle old papers that are filling drawers in your house.

Mentally prepare yourself for change by visualizing your ideal self.

Realize that unexpected events can be a good thing.

Ask people you admire how they got where they are today.

Cut back on alcohol, cigarettes and other vices.

Remove elements of negativity from your life, be they people or a job you don’t want to do.

Start each day with a clear to-do list along with your cup of morning coffee.

Clean your house from top to bottom and throw away anything outdated.

Institute a clear filing system for your personal records.

Do your grocery shopping for the week on the day it’s most convenient.

Take a career test that will help you identify your strengths.

Meet with a professional counselor if there are issues you need to discuss.

Go through cabinets and throw out expired medications or food items.

Make a clear diet plan with an emphasis on whole grains, fruits and vegetables.

Add vitamin pills to your daily diet.

Work out a clear exercise plan with an activity that you enjoy such as dancing or biking.

Set appointments you’ve been putting off.

Take up a mental exercise.

Publish your own book.

Make a reading list and join a book club.

Spend time with yourself each day.

Practice breathing exercises or meditation.

Speak and act with honesty.

Learn from past mistakes.

Volunteer to help others in your community.

Take up a new language or hobby.

Read inspirational biographies.

Talk to a stranger.

Reconnect with friends and relatives who live far away.

Change your toothbrush.

Take more naps.

Drink at least 6 cups of water per day.

Organize your photo collection.

Take an interest in art in your community.

Join a hobbyist club.

Keep a calendar with commitments.

Don’t put off difficult conversations.

Make a list of priorities and do what makes you happy.

Spend more time outdoors.

Attend lectures.

Take the time to stretch muscles.

Make laughter a priority.

Clear some time each day to do nothing.

Schedule a much-needed vacation.

Learn new tips for entertaining.

Throw out old clothing that doesn’t fit.

Live in the present, not the past.

Learn from past mistakes and move forward with your life.

Get your car checked up.

Budget for possible home repairs.

Ways to get Along Better with EveryOne !

1. Before you say anything to anyone, ask yourself 3 things:
Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

2. Make promises sparingly and keep them faithfully.

3. Never miss the opportunity to compliment or say something encouraging to someone.

4. Refuse to talk negatively about others; Don't gossip and don't listen to gossip.

5. Have a forgiving view of people. Believe that most people are doing the best they can.

6. Keep an open mind; Discuss, but don't argue.(It is possible to disagree without being disagreeable.)

7. Forget about counting to 10. Count to 1,000 before doing or saying anything that could make matters worse.

8. Let your virtues speak for themselves.

9. If someone criticizes you, see if there is any TRUTH to what is being said; If so, make changes; If there is no truth to the criticism, ignore it and live so that no one will believe the negative remark.

10. Cultivate your sense of humor; Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.

11. Do not seek so much to be consoled, as to console; Do not seek so much to be understood, as to understand; Do not seek so much to be loved as to love.

-

-

One Paragraph that Explains LIFE

Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of CANCER.

From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed:

"Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease"?

To this Arthur Ashe replied: The world over -- 5 children start playing tennis, 50 learn to play tennis, 5 learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbeldon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD "Why me?"

And today in pain I should not be asking GOD "Why me?"

Happiness keeps u Sweet, Trials keep u Strong, Sorrow keeps u Human, Failure Keeps u Humble, Success keeps u Glowing, But only God Keeps u Going.....

If I were to say, "God, why me?" about the bad things, then I should have said,

"God, why me?" about the good things that happened in my life.

Arthur Ashe

Related Articles :

Alexander the Great... worth reading...

Discover the 90/10 Principle... must read !

How to Recognize your Personal Faults and Make a Change

Make your Life Truly Meaningful

Everything Happens for a Good Reason!

Two Patient's Wisdom

Alexander the Great... worth reading...

The great greek king Alexander, after conquering many kingdoms was returning home. On the way, he fell ill and he was bedridden for months. With death drawing close, Alexander realized how his conquests, his great army, his sharp sword and all his wealth were of no use.

He called his generals and said, " I will depart from this world soon. But I have three wishes. Please fufill my wishes without fail." With tears flowing down their cheeks, the generals agreed to abide by their king's last wishes.

" My first desire is that, " said Alexander, "my physicians alone must carry my coffin. "

" Secondly when my coffin is being carried to the grave, the path leading to the graveyard should be strewn with gold, silver and precious stones which I have collected in my treasure.

My third and last wish is that both my hands should be kept dangling out of my coffin.

The people who had gathered there wondered at the king's strange wishes. But no one dared to question. Alexander's favorite general kissed his hand and pressed them to his heart. " O king, we assure you that your wishes will all be fulfilled. But tell us why do you make such strange wishes ?"

At this Alexander took a deep breath and said, " I would like the world to know of the three lessons I have just learned. I want my physicians to carry my coffin because people should realize that no doctor can really cure anybody. They are powerless and cannot save a person from the clutches of death. So let not people take life for granted. The second wish of strewing gold, silver and other riches on the way to the graveyard is to tell people that not even a fraction of gold can be taken by me. Let people realize that it is sheer waste of time to chase wealth.

And about my third wish of having my hands dangling out of the coffin, I want people to know that I came empty handed into this world and empty handed I go out of this world."

Alexander's last words: " Bury my body, do not build any monument, keep my hands outside so that the world knows the person who won the world had nothing in his hands when dying".