Dating etiquette, Be Your Best Self

Dating etiquette, like social etiquette, is a set of behavior norms to help us feel comfortable with each other on a date.
Etiquette is also common courtesy and when used in dating is a way to indicate that you respect and value your date.

Be on time: Lateness makes a poor impression. Show your date he or she is important by being on time. If unforeseen circumstances arise and can't come at the appointed time, a courtesy call to your date is a must. If you don't call, don't expect him or her to be there when you finally turn up.

Be ready: Try not to come straight from the office or other event. Take time to freshen up (shower, teeth brush, etc.) and pick out attractive clothing that is clean and pressed. Come mentally "ready" by putting work and personal worries out of your mind so you can focus on getting to know your date.

Be positive: There's nothing worse than being trapped on a date with a real downer! Discuss upbeat topics- a recent film you saw, an album just heard or a trip you just returned from. Save your gripes for your friends (or your therapist!). Also, never swear or use vulgar language. It makes you look crude and uneducated.

Be inquisitive: Show interest in your date by asking him or her questions in a friendly manner. Stick to neutral topics, like where he or she grew up, went to school or likes to do for fun. Pace your questions, so you don't sound like an interrogator then politely listen to each answer.

Be courteous: At the end of the evening, offer to walk your date to his or her front door, car, or taxi. This not only shows that you care about the person getting home safely but it also gives a perfect opportunity for a goodnight kiss.

Keep these dating etiquette tips in mind to make a grand impression on your first date.




Courtesy of Philip Powdrill

Creative Problem Solving Techniques

Have you ever encountered a problem only to become stumped trying to come up with a solution? How often have you found yourself saying that there is just no possible answer and you think that you have reached a dead end?

From time to time the problems that we are faced with may be so huge that one may feel like they are hammering against a brick wall. The stress involved with having to solve such a problem can be more than just a little overwhelming.

But have faith and rejoice, for there may be hope yet!

With a more optimistic mindset, a person will find that they are more creative when solving their problems. This article identifies seven creative problem-solving techniques.

1. Take note of assumptions and constraints with the problem. Oftentimes, these assumptions can obstruct our view of possible solutions. Note which assumptions are not valid and which need to be addressed.

2. You need to take a hard look at what the problem really is. Know the problem and have a concrete understanding of what it is about. By knowing what the problem is and how it works, you may find that you will have built a better foundation towards solving the problem.

Identify all the participating entities and then decide what their relationship is to one another. Take note of all the things you stand to gain or loss due to the current problem. Once you have considered the following you should have a clear and simple statement of what the problem is.

3. Try solving the problem in parts. For example, going from the more general views to the more detailed parts of the problem may solve it. This method is called the top down approach. First, write down a question and then come up with a general one-sentence solution, now you will be able to develop the solution even further.

4. It is important to keep a creative and analytical voice of reason at the back of your head. If someone else suggests a solution, be creative, think of how to make the solution work. Also think realistically and look for any possible weak links in the suggested solution.

5. Remain open-minded to the fact that there may be more than one solution to the problem. Keep track of them and go with the one that best fits your situation.

6. You know the old saying, "two heads are better than one." It is so very true, so remember to be open to new ideas. There may be answers for problems that you thought were unsolvable. You will benefit from listening to others, especially when the information is coming from someone who has had experience with a similar problem to yours.

7. Be patient. There is always the chance that the solution will present itself. Remember, no one is able to come up with the right invention the first time around.

So the next time that a problem arises and you think that you are unable to solve it, think again. The solution could be staring you in the face. It just takes some planning, time and a little creative thinking.

Credited to: Kevin Sinclair

Are you still Friends with your Ex ?

So What do you think? How far can Be Ex partner be a friend?

Most love stories have similar fates. While some promise a lifetime of togetherness, others decide to part ways to find a new mate.

Irrespective of whether the break up is mutual or one-sided; a lot of people are curious about their ex-lovers wanting sometimes even to reconnect with their loved ones lost. Once the anger settles down, you put all your memories in your back pocket and decide to move on in life. It might take weeks, months or years, but over a period of time you grow as a person and you learn to forgive.

Chaya Majumdar, a marketing executive says, "Your ex lover knows you better than anybody else. You have shared all sorts of moments together. If things did not work out between the two of you as a couple, how does it make sense to lose a guy who was your best friend at one point of time? Though things can't remain same, but what's the harm in being in touch."

The duration may vary, but most of us end up as well-wishers to our ex lovers with the passage of time. If you learn to deal with a separation sensibly, then it's easier to sit across a coffee table with your ex in time.

Psychiatrist Dr Sanjay Chugh opines, "It is quite possible to develop a healthy relationship with your ex as you already share an emotional proximity and comfort level with that person. It requires a great amount of maturity that most of the people lack. The person should be willing to accept the change in the nature of relationship. "

Once a relationship ends, your ex occupies the role of a friend in your life. And just as you share a different chemistry level with all your friends, the dynamics with your ex metamorphoses through time. With some, you confide everything, with others you just kill time and then there are those with whom you go shopping, bowling and share beer pints. So let's check the varied categories of a healthy ex relationship:

She is my best buddy!

Jeten Rawat, a media person says. "In my case, my girlfriend decided to walk out of the relationship. But soon after, we realized that we still miss sharing our sorrows and success with each other. She remains the one with whom I can share anything and everything without even giving it a thought. I know we are not soul mates, but I couldn't find a better friend."

If you are forgiving enough, then it is easy to remain friends, after all, what is the point of living with lots of bitterness?

Some strings attached

Once an affair goes kaput, every part of the relationship definitely can't go back to normal, but if you manage to subtract possessiveness and expectations from the relationship, you will start enjoying whatever is left between you two.

Richa Tyagi, a medical student adds, "My boyfriend was scared of commitment, so after an intense argument I decided to call it off. After almost a year, I entered into a new relationship and that took all the bitterness away from me. I can't say that I am friends with my ex boyfriend, but yes I am in touch with him. He tries to be really nice and flirtatious with me sometimes. Whenever I talk to him I get this feeling that I am better off now and it satisfies my ego somewhere."

Oops! I did it again...

Some couples decide to be in touch even after their break up as there might be some old feelings left or they are just not ready to let go. However, such relationships come with a 'Handle with care' tag.

Article Source: http://indiatimes.com

12 Tips For Anti-Aging- Be Young And Sexy Again

Do you look older than your spouse or your friends?

Is your spouse no longer attracted towards you?

Stop! Here is the solution to your problem. Read my article only if you are really determined to get rid of all these problems. And if you cannot make any efforts to make yourself look younger and pleasing, then please quit now only. And for those enough determined, here are a few tips for you to look sexier, healthier and younger than you are:

1. Natural supplements-

Natural supplements provide additional antioxidants essential to healthy looking. You will find all natural products offered throughout the web.

2. Maintain healthy eating habits-

Eat lot of fruits and vegetables (raw), the best source of fiber and very refreshing. Avoid oily and fatty food; they lack in essential nutrients n cause obesity.

3. Beat Stress-

Sleep, exercise and a relaxing bath, are the best ways of beating stress. Aroma-therapy is another alternative.

4. Drink lots of Water-

Drink 8 glasses of water everyday, it is a must. Water flushes out the toxins from your body making it clean and less prone to disease.

5. Exercise Regularly-

Regular Physical exercise can delay or prevent illnesses like hypertension, obesity, heart diseases and osteoporosis. It tones your muscles and removes the toxins from your body in the form of sweat. Go for a warm shower after you exercise.

6. Avoid using Strong, Chemical based products on your Skin-

Use Natural skin care products, home made or commercial. Excessive and harsh application of the available skin care products is very harmful.

7. Vitamin C-

Vitamin C based skin care products oxidize very quickly making them harmful for your skin. So store them properly. If it turns Yellowish brown, means vitamin c has oxidized and product has expired.

8. Eat less carbohydrate and protein-

Foods rich in carbohydrates are the worst enemies of a trim tummy. For protein, take fish, egg, and bean instead of meat. Just eat them when you feel peckish between meals, instead of reaching out for chips or biscuits or chocolates.

9. Avoid exposure to excessive sun-

Our skin becomes dry, spotty and leathery with age. So put on a sunscreen after facial moisturizer everytime you go out in the sun or get a moisturizer with sunscreen.

10. Detox periodically-

Detoxification twice or thrice annually is good for blood and liver.

11. Stay Active n Stop Worrying-

Involve yourself in one or the other activity like reading, computer surfing, gardening, playing with your pet, etc. Take it easy. Things can never get better by worrying about them.

12. Go for Yoga or Meditation-

Do yoga for at least 30 minutes a day and see the remarkable positive change in you. You will feel as if you are back in your twenties. 100% Guaranteed!

Staying younger, sexier and healthier is now within your own grasp. What you need is a strong determination. For this you need proper skin care techniques, responsible life-style choices, and few minutes for yourself.

Navneet Brar compares the topmost 5 anti-aging products along with their live traffic ranking, user reviews n user ratings. To get more information on anti-aging products & programs, you can visit her website at top54u.

How to Accept Criticism with Grace and Appreciation

Every day, I get emails and comments that are amazingly positive and encouraging, and in truth these messages are the very thing that sustains my blogging. However, I also get negative comments now and then: criticism of my writing, and not nice criticism either.

How do you deal with criticism? I think the first reaction for most of us is to defend ourselves, or worse yet to lash back. And yet, while criticism can be taken as hurtful and demoralizing, it can also be viewed in a positive way: it is honesty, and it can spur us to do better. It’s an opportunity to improve.

Stop Your First Reaction

If your first reaction is to lash back at the person giving the criticism, or to become defensive, take a minute before reacting at all. Take a deep breath, and give it a little thought. Personally, I tend to get a little angry when I’m criticized. But I have also taught myself not to react right away. For example, I’ll let a critical email sit in my inbox for at least an hour before replying. Or I’ll walk away from someone instead of saying something I’ll regret later. That cooling off time allows me to give it a little more thought beyond my initial reaction. It allows logic to step in, past the emotion. I don’t have anything against emotion, but when it’s a negative emotion, sometimes it can cause more harm than good. So I let my emotions run their course, and then respond when I’m calmer.

Turn a Negative Into a Positive

One of the keys to my success in anything I do is my ability to find positive things in things that most people see as a negative. Sickness forces me to stop my exercise program? That’s a welcome rest. Tired of my job? That’s a time to rediscover what’s important and to look for a better job. Supertyphoon ruined all my possessions? This allowed me to realize that my stuff wasn’t important, and to be thankful that my loved ones were still alive and safe. You can do the same thing with criticism: find the positive in it. Sure, it may be rude and mean, but in most criticism, you can find a nugget of gold: honest feedback and a suggestion for improvement. For example, this criticism: “You write about the same things over and over and your posts are boring and stale.” Can be read: “I need to increase the variety of my posts and find new ways of looking at old things.” That’s just one example of course — you can do that with just about any criticism. Sometimes it’s just someone having a bad day, but many times there’s at least a grain of truth in the criticism. See it as an opportunity to improve — and without that constant improvement, we are just sitting still. Improvement is a good thing.

Thank the Critic

Even if someone is harsh and rude, thank them. They might have been having a bad day, or maybe they’re just a negative person in general. But even so, your attitude of gratitude will probably catch them off-guard. And you know what? My habit of thanking my critics has actually won a few of them over. They became friends of mine, and eventually a couple of them became some of my biggest proponents. All because of a simple act of saying thank you for the criticism. It’s unexpected, and often appreciated. And even if the critic doesn’t take your “thank you” in a good way, it’s still good to do — for yourself. It’s a way of reminding yourself that the criticism was a good thing for you, a way of keeping yourself humble.

Learn from the Criticism

After seeing criticism in a positive light, and thanking the critic, don’t just move on and go back to business as usual. Actually try to improve. That’s a difficult concept for some people, because they often think that they’re right no matter what. But no one is always right. You, in fact, may be wrong, and the critic may be right. So see if there’s something you can change to make yourself better. And then make that change. Actually strive to do better.

When I received criticism that my posts weren’t as good as they could be, I strove to improve. I tried hard to write better posts. Now, did I actually accomplish that? That’s a matter of opinion — some will say no, while others seemed to enjoy the posts. Personally, I’ve been rather proud of some of these posts, and I’m glad I made the extra effort.

Be the Better Person

Too many times we take criticism as a personal attack, as an insult to who we are. But it’s not. Well, perhaps sometimes it is, but we don’t have to take it that way. Take it as a criticism of your actions, not your person. If you do that, you can detach yourself from the criticism emotionally and see what should be done. But the way that many of us handle the criticisms that we see as personal attacks is by attacking back. “I’m not going to let someone talk to me that way.” Especially if this criticism is made in public, such as in the comments of a blog. You have to defend yourself, and attack the attacker … right? Wrong. By attacking the attacker, you are stooping to his level. Even if the person was mean or rude, you don’t have to be the same way. You don’t have to commit the same sins.

Be the better person.

If you can rise above the petty insults and attacks, and respond in a calm and positive manner to the meat of the criticism, you will be the better person. And guess what? There are two amazing benefits of this: 1. Others will admire you and think better of you for rising above the attack. Especially if you remain positive and actually take the criticism well. This has happened to me, when people actually complimented me on how I handled attacking comments. 2. You will feel better about yourself. By participating in personal attacks, we dirty ourselves. But if we can stay above that level, we feel good about who we are. And that’s the most important benefit of all. How do you stay above the attacks and be the better person? By removing yourself from the criticism, and looking only at the actions criticized. By seeing the positive in the criticism, and trying to improve. By thanking the critic. And by responding with a positive attitude. A quick example: Someone criticizes one of my posts by saying, “You’re an idiot. I don’t understand what x has to do with y.”

My typical response will be to first, ignore the first sentence. And second, to say something like, “Thanks for giving me an opportunity to clarify that. I don’t think I made it as clear as I should have. What x has to do with y is … blah blah. Thanks for the great question!”

And by ignoring the insult, taking it as an opportunity to clarify, thanking the critic, using the opportunity to explain my point further, and staying positive, I have accepted the criticism with grace and appreciation. And in doing so, remained the better person, and felt great about myself.

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Tips on Self Management

You are responsible for everything that happens in your life. Learn to accept total responsibility for yourself. If you do not manage yourself, then you are letting others have control of your Life. These tips will help "you" manage "you."

Here is a list of things that help you in self management and which will in turn lead you to the path of success: -

-) Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.

-) Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.

-) Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.

-) Frequently ask, "Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?"

-) Do it right the first time and you will not have to take time later to fix it.

-) Accept responsibility for your job successes and failures. Do not look for a scapegoat.

-) Do not view things you do as a "job." View all activities as a challenge.

-) Use your subconscious mind by telling it to do what you do want. Instead of telling yourself, "I can't do that very well," say, "I can do this very well."-) Give yourself points for completing tasks on your "to-do" list in priority order. When you reach 10 points, reward yourself.

-) Practice your personal beliefs. It may be helpful each morning to take 15 minutes to gather your thoughts and say a prayer.

-) Make a commitment to show someone a specific accomplishment on a certain date. The added urgency will help you feel motivated to have it done.

-) Practice self-determination, wanting to do it for yourself.

-) Believe that you can be what you want to be.

-) Never criticize yourself as having a weakness. There is no such thing. You are only talking about a present undeveloped skill or part of yourself that if you so chose, you can change. You do not have any weakness, only untapped potential.

-) Be pleasant all the time-no matter what the situation.

-) Challenge yourself to do things differently than you have in the past. It provides new ideas and keeps you interested.

-) Talk to yourself. A self-talk using positive affirmation is something that is common among all great achievers. They convince themselves that they can accomplish their goals.

-) Create your own "motivation board" by putting up notes of things you need to do on a bulletin board or special wall space. It is an easily visible way to see what you need to work on. When an item is done, remove the note. Also keep your goals listed and pictured on your board.

-) Stay interested in what you are doing. Keep looking for what is interesting in your work. Change your perspective and look at it as someone outside your job would,

-) Establish personal incentives and rewards to help maintain your own high enthusiasm and performance level.

Simplest Cure for Insomnia

For years I had a mild-to-medium case of insomnia, often staying up late watching crappy television and eating junk food because I couldn’t fall asleep, no matter how tired I was.

It is miserable. You walk through the day like a zombie, unable to function properly. You desperately try to sleep but nothing works. Sleeping pills leave you feeling drugged out.

My first simple cure was running. I’d try to get up 15 minutes earlier each day to run, and the running would leave me very tired but I still had a day ahead of me. I’d be so exhausted by bedtime that I slept instantly. Hard exercise is a great fix for insomnia.

Recently I’ve had another slight bout of insomnia, and so I rediscovered a trick I learned several years ago. It’s so simple it seems like it can’t possibly work, but it unfailingly does.

The simplest cure for insomnia: get comfortable and close your eyes, and then replay your day in your head, in every detail possible, from the moment you woke up. Start from the moment your eyes opened, and replay every movement — getting out of bed, starting the coffeemaker, going to the bathroom, washing your hands, or whatever. Don’t summarize — leave nothing out.

It works. I’ve never made it to mid-morning in my mind movies. I inevitably fall asleep. It’s much better than counting sheep (I’ve tried) and even better than meditation (I’ve done that too). Try it, and when it works, praise me in your dreams.

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